Quick Thoughts
Small thoughts and messages not worthy of their own pages but still something I feel like putting out there. Largely curated and possibly lightly edited from my posts and discussions in the WFM server.
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If I can get away with cheating then it’s someone’s fault for leaving that option open, and I may as well just take advantage of it . . . đ
I also use that same mindset to close up holes in my programming a lot more on the first pass than most people usually would.
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I’m too much of a masochist to do punishment dynamics. And a system gamer. If I can get away with cheating, I will. And the idea of being unhappy with an outcome just doesn’t work because it turns me on a bit too much.
While I don’t mind predicament games, I don’t play with punishments for trying to actually motivate me for anything.
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Different take on findom tasks —
âFinish this task then deposit $50 into your own savings accountâ -
I feel like sharing . . .
Iâve struggled with trying to eat right and exercise for a long time. I have so many other things Iâm busy doing that it slips my mind entirely and suddenly Iâve found way too much time has passed since the last time I exercised or ate a vegetable.And now as part of our dynamic I have daily tasks to exercise and eat vegetables, and if I want âexcessâ sugar/desserts I have to ask permission. And itâs been great. Itâs so much easier to remember to go for a walk or eat some carrots if itâs not my choice and I have to make a report of it. Itâs also easier to limit desserts if Iâm given a limit that isnât my decision. There hasnât even been much craving over it. Apparently I agonized over the sugar choices because it was my choice – if itâs not my choice then thereâs no more concern.
So much easier. đ
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Made a private discord just for Tim and me. And I programmed a bot to lock me out of a channel on a timer đ
It’s… kind of hot tbhThe channel is specifically so he can send me sexy taunting messages that would be too distracting for me if I read them at work . . . so I don’t get to see them until after work is over.
The bot is set up to lock me out of the channel at 8am through the end of the work day on a schedule. And I was sitting there thinking of ways I had around it . . . and closing them up. Which turned me on a bit I have to say. Because Iâm voluntarily doing this to myself đ
But I love the idea of fun ideas waiting for me as soon as work is over . . .
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Well we spent a good portion of the night talking instead of playing and honestly that was great. But we did get a little play in.
He had me lay still while he put clothespins on me and overstimulated me. Tied my hands down which allowed me to pull against those ropes, but I just had to keep my legs in place while he continued to mess with me – putting clothespins on my labia and overstimulating my clit, hard enough and long enough that I actually broke and asked for a break. But I kept my legs in place! And I’m very sore.
All in all my mind was definitely taken off my day-to-day stress for the evening and that was nice.
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Play session scheduled tonight. Been in a state of sub frenzy for like 2 months and had some extra stressful shit happen yesterday so I’m hoping for a difficult play session / evening to clear my head.
Spent some time writing out things that I’ve been thinking about that I want / âwantâ and sent it to Tim and … definitely a bit wet but more than that my face feels so hot đł
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Oh man. That was the most stressful afternoon at work I’ve had in a long time.
Good timing on the play session tonight. I expect I’ll forget all about work…
No room for thoughts about other things going on in my life when I’m âworriedâ about just what’s going to happen next đ -
I don’t do punishment dynamics. I will absolutely game any system I’m in. I will make choices that aren’t good for âfuture meâ or the dynamic. So if I want to be in a dynamic at all I have to be up front and honest about what I can and can’t do, and what I am and am not doing and why and be able to work with someone who can work with that.
I don’t outright disobey. I don’t have room to disobey if I’m not in a punishment dynamic. I either do as I’m told or I’m breaking the dynamic I wanted to be in in the first place.
If I do disobey, either accidentally or intentionally, for any reason, we have a real conversation about what went wrong and how to prevent it going forward. Were the expectations too high? Do I need a break from the dynamic? Do I just need to set up better reminders (frequently the issue)? Was it something unavoidable due to external reasons? etc.
I actually don’t like the word âpunishmentâ and will frequently replace it with âconsequencesâ since it feels more accurate for most uses. But I get that the community as a whole tends to prefer âpunishmentâ due to the naughty nature of the word (ânaughtyâ being another word I don’t like and never use, lol).
That all being said, I am fine with games with consequences as long as they are limited in scope.
I also have a suffering kink and what I consider to be light masochism (although I’ve been told it’s not that light), so I can get myself in some real trouble trying to scratch an itch in those types of dynamics, lol
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I’ve actually been wanting to talk to Tim about more D/s stuff but fuck I just don’t think I realistically have the time right now đ đ©
But I’m so stressed I’d love a bit more structure and things that aren’t me just chasing my tail -
Looking forward to hopefully a long play session with Tim when taxes are done. Will hopefully work out some of this stress
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idk about the electric stuff. I had a bad experience with someone with that once. I’m willing to try it with Tim, and he teases me with the possibility occasionally, but I’ve made no promises that I won’t freak out đ
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a collar is whatever you want it to be
necklace, bracelet, etc.
I love the idea of an anklet -
Someone has mentioned coloring in mandalas for doms and someone else mentioned diamond paintings. And I really wanted to do one. Tim picked this one out, bought it, and I worked on it for him over like 1-2 weeks IIRC, and he has it hanging on his bedroom wall now đ
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I spent about 20 hours making a scarf for Tim this winter. He picked out the yarn and I worked on it every night before bed for like a month or two
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Subs collaring themselves is getting popular. I see people doing it on reddit regularly.
